KEYS TO A
SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE
The following article is the result of an
accumulation of 78 years of marital experiences.
If these thoughts can help some young person
to build a foundation for a strong marriage,
or help to heal a broken marriage,
our prayerswill have been answered.
Key 1
One of the foundations of a lasting marriage is to
BE COMMITTED
to each other and to making the marriage work.
A generation or two ago, marriages were stable
and divorce was not as widespread as it is today.
We believe this was due to the commitment of people
entering into the marriage relationship.
Divorce should not be an option.
There are situations, of course,
where there is abuse and infidelity which cannot,
and should not be tolerated.
Not in every case, but in most cases, if discernmentis used in
Key 2, this type of abuse will not be found.
Key 2
One of the most important keys to
a successful marriage is to
CHOOSE THE RIGHT MATE.
Young people get caught up in the romance and the
physical attraction, and they don't consider whether
the object of their attraction will help or hinder
them in their spiritual development.
Of course, the foundation for choice
should have been laid years before.
Just because a person falls in "love",
doesn't necessarily mean that person you "love"
would make a good spouse.
Hormones need to be governed by reason.
God made us creatures of choice.
In fact, our lives are a product of the choices we make.
Key 3
An admonition for young people.
REMAIN SEXUALLY PURE UNTIL MARRIAGE.
Your marriage will have a greater chance of success
if you do. Young people today who are taking a stand
against pre-marital sex are to be applauded.
Key 4
Early in the marriage a couple needs to
ACCEPT GOD'S PLAN FOR THE FAMILY
Let Christ be the head of the family,
and let the husband be the spiritual leader in the family.
A loving husband will not be overbearing.
Key 5
DON'T WITHHOLD LOVE AND AFFECTION
or use it as a weapon to get your own way.
God has given specific instructions about the
physical relationship between husband and wife.
Key 6
LISTEN TO ONE ANOTHER.
Keep the lines of communication open.
Few things can be more detrimental to a marriage
than the refusal of one of the partners to discuss problems.
Work it out together if you can, but don't hesitate to get
outside help in the form of Christian counseling
if it is required.
Key 7
DON'T NEGLECT YOUR SPOUSE
while you are raising your children.
Long after the children have left home,
you will need each other.
A loving relationship must be built
while the children are growing up.
Key 8
Money can cause problems so
COME TO AN AGREEMENT ABOUT
THE HANDLING OF FINANCES
Sometimes this is a joint effort,
but sometimes one partner is
better equipped to handle the family finances.
The other partner needs to defer to the one with this gift.
Key 9
TAKE CARE OF YOUR HEALTH
so that you can enjoy
your relationship with one another
for many years.
Key 10
GIVE EACH OTHER ROOM
FOR INDIVIDUAL GROWTH
and for personal likes and dislikes.
One may be a sports fan, the other may not.
Not all things have to be shared.
Key 11
BE WILLING TO SAY, "I'M SORRY"
when you are wrong.
Truly mean it, and try to make improvements.
Key 12
BE WILLING TO FORGIVE
when you have been wronged by your spouse.
Key 13
Make every effort to
ARRANGE FOR THE WIFE AND
MOTHER TO BE IN THE HOME
during the years when the children are growing up.
A working mother with young children is actually
holding down two full time jobs.
She has little time nor energy left for
her husband at the end of the day.
Key 14
As parents
SUPPORT EACH OTHER IN THE
DISCIPLINING OF THE CHILDREN
Failure to do so will cause the marriage
and the children to suffer.
Key 15
Hold your spouse in high esteem.
MAKE POSITIVE REMARKS
ABOUT YOUR MATE
TO FRIENDS AND FAMILY.
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